The moment of loss
God is sacrificial love.
Sacrificial love is love in which the one who loves loses something, sometimes everything, and doesn’t expect it back.
That is the heart of the Gospel and the meaning of the cross.
Think about it - as he is being killed Jesus says a staggeringly loving thing - “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.” That is pure love and it is sacrificial because there is no gain in it for Jesus. There is only loss.
His murder continues. His killers don’t hear him say, “Father forgive them,” see their evil ways in a new light, and then pull him down from the cross and administer first aid.
In fact quite the opposite, after he said that most loving thing, they cast lots to divide his clothing, mock him, and then pierce his side with a spear. Put another way, after he gives voice to the deep spirit of sacrificial love they double down on their cruelty toward him.
Sacrificial love is love that comes with a loss.
Two questions come to mind at this point. The first is this - would I take a loss for love? In other words, if someone would gain from my loss would I take the loss for love; sacrificial love?
The second question is this - when I lose can I stand still in the moment of loss instead of springing into action, in order to see what God might be up to?
The moment of loss has really got my attention. In the moment of loss what do we do? Do we run? Do we let our anger and our fear get the best of us and end up doing or saying something cruel? Or do we just stand still with the slender hope that the moment of loss is crucial to the next step in our relationship with God.
My sense is that standing still in the landscape of loss is the thing to do, hard as it is, because God is waiting for us in the loss and will eagerly take us to a new depth of relationship if we meet him there.
The other side of the loss of the cross was resurrection. Something new awaits us all on the other side of loss. What loss are you facing right now? If you don’t run from it I wonder what new thing will emerge in the garden of your life freshly tilled by the loss.
You might like to read through the Gospel and look for the moments of loss. Where do people experiencing loss simply stand still in front of Jesus and wait for grace? I am thinking of the man who called himself Legion because he was possessed by many demons. I am thinking of the little boy who stood still in front of Jesus in front of 5000 hungry people holding up 2 fish and a few loaves of bread. I am thinking of the woman caught in adultery. I am thinking of the people throwing a wedding party who ran out of wine. All these folks and more stood still in the landscape of their losses before Jesus and God did something spectacular with the loss. Grace awaits us all of the time; maybe we just have to stand still to let it catch hold of us.