The man who wouldn’t fight you

I knew a man one time who wouldn’t fight you for anything. People tried to drag him into this and that, but they never could get a rise out of him. He just wouldn’t fight. Wouldn’t throw stones. This fellow wouldn’t engage even when the fans were flamed and heading his way. I watched him from a distance for years. I learned something about people. Folks love a fight, and a bunch of them get mad when they find someone who won’t join them in mudslinging.

The man confused me. I admired him, don’t get me wrong. But he was a great mystery to me. Why wouldn’t he fight? One day I got up the courage to ask him. 

I have noticed something about you, I said.

He just smiled at me. 

Why won’t you fight?

Fight? He said.

Yes, I’ve seen people try to drag you into this, that, and the other. I’ve watched folks get riled up all around you, and you just stand there. Why won’t you fight?

He smiled and laughed a little. Then he said, You really want to know?

Yes, I said. I hope I haven’t offended you. I don’t mean to sound critical. I admire it. I want to know your secret.

Oh, I don’t have a secret, he said. My wife and I lost a child. Samuel is his name. When he died all the fight I ever had in me left slowly day by day until one day I was just empty. No fight left in me. Just love. Now, I don’t know how that sounds to you, it’s none of my business what you think about it. I just know that every moment is a gift. Life itself is nothing but a strange, short gift, and I am not going to waste a second of it fighting. Besides I figure there’s enough people in this world fighting. We ought to have at least a few of us who don’t care to fight. 

Then he said, “About 10 years after Samuel died I almost died. There’s nothing like nearly dying to squeeze the fight out of you. Some people need to fight. Best I can figure they get high on it. Not me. Not anymore. Let me just live. This thing is short. We’ll all be dead soon. I’m not going to waste my time fighting. That make sense to you?” he said.

“Yes,” I said. That was a lie. It didn’t make sense to me, but I wanted it to. One day, I thought, maybe the fight will leave me. I hope so.